A Sanctuary (Part Two, Chapter Four)

When Mr. Charrington agreed to let me use his spare room for my affair with Julia, I was positively ecstatic. Finally a place where we could meet and feel like a real couple. So close at hand and convenient, it is the perfect spot for us to see each other. But even though it seems so safe, I still feel uneasy about the whole relationship. I know that I have committed thoughtcrime, and I know that I will soon be caught and tortured. Sometimes this just seems like too much, and I am not ready to face it. But the more I am with Julia, the stronger and more confident I feel. I was overjoyed when she brought sugar, bread, jam, and real coffee. I had not tasted such succulent food since any time I can remember. The overall feeling of freedom that I get when I meet with Julia, that not only comes from her, but also from the room, the food, and simply the act of being there, makes me realize how much more I hate the Party. How could they rob me of such basic pleasures. They have tried to steal my humanity. But I will not let them.